So many singles say they want to get married. Then I ask them, “If Mr. Right proposed right now, are you ready?” They usually have a list of reasons why they are not, from wanting to “finish their website first” to the fear of losing who they are. What are you afraid of, if anything?

One of the keys for my client who went from being single to engaged in less than 7 months is that she overcame her fear of marriage. At the time of her second Love Consultation, she was afraid of actually getting what she wanted. Marriage was “foreign” to her. It meant “literally sharing my life with someone.” My client also saw many examples of people who “never should have been married in the first place.” Have you?

During that session, she went from being afraid of giving up “doing whatever I want, when I want, and how I want” to “I’m ready to have everything.” [Meaning marriage…and doing what she wanted].

My client asked for what she really wanted, which was “having our life together and able to do things with others,” with no envy. And that is exactly the man she attracted.

LOVE TIP:

Being Ready for Marriage is a Choice.

1. Are you ready to be married? Being ready is a choice. What do you choose?
2. Are you afraid of losing yourself in your [future] marriage? It is your job to remain the real you. Make a list of the things you love to do and have an affair every week…with you.
3. Are you ready to share your closet? If your clothes and your closet space are more important than the love of your life, you’re right, you’re not ready.
4. What scares you about being married, if anything? Ask for what you need. Click here for the 4 steps to a Specific Request.
5. Are you afraid of getting what you really want? This is an “I’m not worthy” issue. You need to work on you. Take yourself on 30 Dates in 30 Days™ to fall in love with you and truly know your value.
6. When you are married, will you feel as though you missed out on something? With the right person, you will experience even more of life together. Make a list of the 100 qualities you desire in your partner. If you want adventure, ask for an adventurous partner.
7. Do you want to achieve something in your career before you get married? There will always be “the next thing” in your career. Make a choice. (p.s. You can have it all).
8. Are you ready to share your life with someone? If not, what are you hiding? It is your responsibility to accept everything about you; when you do, the right man will accept you.
9. Have you seen people you thought should never have been married in the first place? The statistics say that those people knew before they walked down the aisle, that they shouldn’t. Don’t get married unless you “know.” Make a list of 100 qualities you desire in your marriage. Know your deal breakers around sex, money, marriage, children, and religion. Have a healthy conversation and make sure there are no deal breakers before you walk down the aisle.

Another client is engaged. Her fiance got down on one knee, presented her a beautiful ring, and asked for her hand in marriage. She is “thrilled.” And I am ecstatic for her!

Do you have the exact love life you desire? I want you to have what you want. This is how this specific client went from being single to engaged:

1. She completed my 30 Dates in 30 Days™ system *in integrity.
2. She didn’t do the “bar scene;” she did what she loved to do.
3. She completely accepted her flaws and loved herself completely.
4. She allowed others to see the real her.
5. She is ready for marriage.
6. She did not settle.
7. She knew she was worth it and deserved it.

Which of those things are missing for you?

I will be doing a series of blog entries to cover each concept for you to attract the love of your life. Check back for details on the specific steps to go from being single to engaged!

Today, one of my male clients told me he is “absolutely in love!” And he talked about how “quirky and funny” she is. What are your funny quirks? What is your eccentric essence? What makes you unique? That is what Mr. Right will find adorable about you. That is what makes you one-of-a-kind to your one true love.

One of the best compliments I have received is that I’m an enigma. Although it may seem like a strange compliment, it meant the world to me because he was the first man who really saw me. He was also the first man to tell me I’m sexy; again, it was so significant because it was based on my unique beauty. I love dining at fabulous restaurants and savoring wine and I love going to a dive bar and drinking beer. I’m a city girl and a mountain girl; I love New York and I love Aspen. I wear stilettos and hiking boots. I’m a member of an exclusive ladies social group and I ride a Harley. I want to be married, but I don’t want to “settle down.”

Men are attracted to your unique imperfections, according to the movie Goodwill Hunting, which was written by two very attractive (= talented) men, Ben Affleck and Matt Damon:

Sean (Robin Williams): My wife used to fart when she was nervous. She had all sorts of wonderful little idiosyncrasies. She used to fart in her sleep. I thought I’d share that with you. One night it was so loud, it woke the dog up. She woke up and went, ‘Ah was that you?’ And I didn’t have the heart to tell her.
Will (Matt Damon): She woke herself up?
Sean (Robin Williams): Ah…but Will, she’s been dead for 2 years, and that’s the shit I remember; wonderful stuff, you know? Little things like that. Those are the things I miss the most. The little idiosyncrasies that only I know about; that’s what made her my wife. Oh she had the goods on me too, she knew all my little peccadilloes. People call these things imperfections, but they’re not. No, that’s the good stuff.

[Click here for the full scene where he says, “The question is whether or not you’re perfect for each other].”

What makes you unique? What do you love about those qualities? That is what “he” will fall in love with.

Have you invested hundreds of dollars in a personal trainer in hopes of making yourself marketable in the singles market? Are you working insane hours to increase your income to be attractive to the opposite sex? Are you trying to be perfect for “him” or “her?”

Stop trying to be perfect; instead, accept that you are perfect today. You don’t need to do anything. You just need to be you. It’s not about the size of your thighs or your bank account. You are perfect just the way you are. If you don’t believe me, believe Billy Joel: “Don’t go changing to try and please me…I want you just the way you are.” That is the way marriage is meant to be.

Can you imagine spending the rest of your life trying to impress your husband or wife? You would be exhausted by your first anniversary. It takes a lot more energy to pretend to be something you are not than to be yourself and be happy. You are not meant to prove yourself to your partner. Your partner is meant to be your biggest fan, for better or for worse. The right Mr. or Mrs. Right is the one who wants you “just the way you are.”

Watching The Bachelor last night, Brad and Michelle went on a date where they rappelled down the side of a tall building. Michelle was scared and “freaking out” and needed to be held in Brad’s big strong arms to be reassured.

Personally, I would have been excited and ready to rappel! But, from what I observed, Brad had the chance to be the knight in shining armor to the damsel in distress and showered her with attention.

In reality, (not reality TV), is it a turn-off for a woman to be fearless and independent?

I can fix a flat tire; I travel the world for new adventures; and I’m financially independent. And I know hundreds of other single women that are the same.

At the same time, I’m just a girl who wants to be loved. I’ve told my ex-boyfriends that in the past and they still decided they couldn’t be my “knight.” What is an independent girl to do?

Ladies: Are you a Damsel in Distress or Miss Independent?

Men: Do you prefer a Damsel in Distress or Miss Independent?

Are you hiding who you really are? What are you gaining from keeping your guard up? Do you think it’s safer behind your fragile fake walls?

Your walls are not protecting you. They are only highlighting what you think you have to hide. A real man can handle the real you. And he needs to see you in order to keep seeing you.

Let down your guard to let in love.

What is one thing you will reveal about the real you today?

hot mess = no rose

For those of you unfamiliar with the term, a “hot mess” is: (slang, chiefly in used in the South) a derogatory term describing a situation, behavior, appearance, etc. that is disastrously bad and embarrassing. Think “faux pas” times ten.

Have you ever seen a hot mess? Save your friends from themselves. If they simply have to express their emotions, take them to the ladies room and lock the door. Give them a pep talk, then rejoin the party.

Dating Advice: Even if you’re hot, don’t be a hot mess. (You will not get the guy).

I’ve been researching what is sexy. I’ve looked at lingerie. I’ve flipped through fashion magazines. I’ve studied Hollywood stars.

The bottom line is…be you to be sexy.

Yes, men are visually stimulated at first sight. When they come closer, it’s about your energy—the real you. Chemistry is not about two people being equally good looking. The sexy spark is a matter of matching energies.

What are your top 3 unique, alluring qualities?

Exude your alluring energy. And enjoy the adoring attention!

xoxo

Tasha

I’m willing to put myself totally out there and say I’m sexy: I’m wildly happy, rock-solid-self-confident, and powerful love. As a bonus, I like to have a lot of fun. I don’t think “I’m too sexy;” I just haven’t met a man who “gets” my sexy…yet.

Do you feel sexy?

What is sexy about you? [Click on “Comment” and share your sexy].

If you’re not quite there yet, click on the video link for a little inspiration…

I wish you a sexy-fun weekend!

xoxo

For example, you’re at a bar and there is a group of five women or men. At a distance, you pick out the hottest one. You walk up to the group and start interacting and engaging; then, you’re experiencing their true sexiness—their energy. Now, you can determine who is most desirable.

To me, self-confidence is sexy. Happiness is hot. And power is a turn-on.

What do you find sexy in the opposite sex?

xoxo

Tasha